Condom Talk at Work

This post might be kind of inappropriate, but it is something that happened to me today, so I'm going to suck it up and take whatever criticism that comes my way - like Amy Grant.

So, this week at work, all the board members are in town, meeting with the executives all day. They hole up in our board room eating grapes, drinking sparkling water, and generally, they just talk about important/probably boring stuff.

Anwyay, this morning, I kept having to go back and forth across the parking lot. Obviously, I first had to walk into the building, but then, I kept having to go out and get some information about my tires, because I'm going to buy some new ones. The first three or four times, I kept my mouth shut about something I was observing out there, but it got to the point where I just had to tell someone.

So after my fourth or fifth trip back to the office, I say, to my peer, a 27-year-old woman at the front desk who is my new friend, I say, "Hey, did you notice that condom out in the parking lot?" She says no, but she saw a bunch in 7th grade in the trash can and was traumatized. She asked me where it was in the parking lot. I said it was just now leafblown away by the leaf blowers. She said they must have some funny stories, those leaf blowers. ...Neither of us was speaking too loudly, because the fancy board meeting was transpiring just a few feet away, behind closed doors. Or, at least I thought that's why we weren't speaking loudly.

Just then, one of the board members (male, middle-aged) steps out of the kitchen, which is a nook that is a mere 10 steps from this girl's desk. He says 'hello' to us on his way back to the meeting to try and break the silence. It was the most awkward 15 seconds I've had in a long time.

He walked into the room, shut the door, and the girl said, "Yeah, I didn't really get the chance to tell you he was there before you made that announcement."

So yeah, there's that. And then there's the fact that I had about 16 poppy seeds in my teeth when I met one of the board members. Oh, and he met me while I was sitting on this huge ball.

This is my day so far.